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On Booty Texts

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I have a revolutionary idea for a new text message feature:  Any incoming text after 10pm from a former OR prospective boyfriend shall receive in response an auto-generated message that simply says

“If this was a test, you just failed.”

NOTE: Close friends and family are exempt from this feature. If you’re “in” with me, my phone number has no curfew. There is no maybe. Just call me.  (har har)

Why do I view this as a dealbreaker?

First, I was raised by two awesome parents that instilled in me a respect for other people’s time – and that includes the hour of the day for communications.  I expect the same in return, ESPECIALLY if you are just getting to know me, or let’s be real…trying to get in my pants.

Secondly, and perhaps selfishly, this gal adores her ‘me time’ late at night – when the house is quiet, and the only worries are what to scope out on Pinterest next while watching DVR’ed trainwreck shows. Or perhaps a taking long soak in the tub with a glass of Cab and an embarrassingly girly novel. Or staying up until 2am writing if the mood strikes. It’s my time and it makes me happy.

So if my phone honks at me (yes, my text message is set to a circus clown-style honking noise. I am a dork.) at close to midnight and I see some horribly disguised attempt at starting up a sexting session … I’m not turned on.  I’m disappointed.  Because I’m worth more than that. It’s that simple.

My point is… show a little common courtesy, guys.  Or heaven forbid, CALL ME at a normal hour and have an actual conversation with me, with intelligent WORDS and emotional inflections! *gasp, the horror!!!*  But most of all, if you want me, put some effort into it.

Am I being silly?  Or overly sensitive?  You tell me.

Or maybe they just need this.

6 responses »

  1. The Do Not Disturb feature coming with iOS6 this fall should enable you to protect your ‘me time’. (scroll down about half way to Phone.)

  2. I’m way out of the loop, but do guys really do that these days? Holy crap! The late night texts I get are usually from my 20 year old letting me know she has a flat tire or wondering what her bank balance is. Now that I think of it, I’m not sure which is worse.

    • Sadly, it is an all-too-common occurrence these days. You’d think I looked like Quasimodo the way these guys are handling communication. Pitiful, I tell you. Ah, to be 20 again. Wait…. nevermind.

  3. Oh you have no idea how many of those I get! I will definitely use the “it’s dark” comment the next time I get the past 10pm text!


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