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I must’ve fallen and bumped my little head.

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I’ve officially lost my mind.  I did it.  I tried CrossFit.

What prompted this?  I’ve been reading a lot of health-type blogs lately and I’ve been extremely intrigued by anything/everything CrossFit related.  As in… furrow the brows, squint at the computer screen and go, “good god, how is she lifting that much?” and “if I do that will my body look that GOOD?!?!”.

Sometime last week I said screw it. What do I have to lose?  I researched my local options and called one that looked best. After getting my gazillion questions answered over the phone, I said, “okay. Sign me up for 6:30 tonight”.  I made sure to arrive fueled (but not full) and hydrated.  Still didn’t help the butterflies. omgwhatamIdoing.

Here’s what I didn’t know.  Thursdays are a “down” day at this gym.  There were a handful of folks in the 5:30pm class finishing up as I arrived, but I was the only person there for the 6:30 class.  One-on-one training for my first time out? Score!!! I tried not to gawk at the torture-esque equipment or the ropes and rings hanging from the ceiling.  Fifty Shades kinkery, anyone? Anyone?

I kid, I kid.

Here’s what the CrossFit rookie did:

Warmup:  Row machine, ring pullups, jump lunges and situps – The ring pullups were ouchie. Luckily they adjusted the pullup position for my weakling-upper-body-strength, but still. Ouch. That’s what I felt the most for the next 2 days.

NOT what I’m able to do. Yet.

The WOD (workout of the day):

  1. BOX JUMPS: Jumping up onto a 20″ high box seems daunting, but it’s doable.  Once or twice.  (for me, that’s about as high as my kneecaps.) I wound up doing 46 of them total. Holy shit.
  2. TOES TO BARS: Hanging from a bar and lifting your legs up until your toes hit the bar? Sure I can do that!  So I thought…. nope.  Tried and failed. Modification: I lifted my knees as high as I could and tried not to swing like a monkey in the process.
  3. POWER CLEANS (olympic-style lift): This is HARD. I still don’t feel like I fully “got” the form of it, but it was difficult to tell with only a PVC pipe and a 10# bar.

Those are just the descriptions.  The actual routine was this: Do 15 of each exercise, then 12, then 9, then 6, then 3, then 1… as fast as you can, without stopping in between exercises. It’s timed.

And I have to say… I loved it.  It was VERY challenging, even after hitting the gym hard since April.  After doing the 15 reps and the 12 reps, at about the 9 rep point, my heart rate was up to 185 bpm.  (On my longest run so far, my HR didn’t get above 175.)  I was breathing HARD and wanted to punch the trainer for telling me to keep going, don’t stop!  I didn’t, even though I would have given my left kidney for the chance to catch my damn breath.  Sweat was running down my face, dripping off my nose.  And my language!!! I must have dropped 10-15 F-bombs during the agony. Oopsie. I really am a delicate flower, I promise.

By the last box jump I was dead sure that I was going to under-jump and faceplant on the damn thing… and just as that thought ran through my freaking-the-hell-out mind, the trainer yelled at me, “DON’T THINK! JUST GO!”.  I swung my arms and heaved myself upward one last time and was shocked when my feet landed solidly in the center of the box!  Dude. I did it.

When all was said and done, I finished that WOD in 9min, 10 seconds.  I walked around the place in a sweaty daze, desperately trying to slow my breaths that were rapid-firing in and out of my screaming lungs, hands above my head – because I knew I shouldn’t sit.  If I sat, I’d weep in gratitude on the floor and never get back up.  Then I looked down at my hands, bewildered as to why they were aching.  And I saw the baby callouses.


Once I recovered, the trainer said that my athletic ability was above average compared to most women starting out, and that I picked up on the instructions quickly. They think CrossFit is perfect for me and will get me better results than going it alone at a big-box gym. I want to go back and try another class there – one with more people in it. I also want to try a different CrossFit gym in the area, just to compare, before I decide on one.  I think I may like the smaller, more community feel of CF.  Anything would be a thousand times better better than staying in a gym full of meatheads who won’t leave me the hell alone.

Because that nonsense makes me want to go all …. THIS ….. on them.


Laters, baby.


15 responses »

  1. That looks like one hell of a workout! When I started kickboxing, I almost died in the first class 🙂

  2. Hahahah that sounds killer. Love the cat gif!

  3. I’m going to have to go take a nap, I’m so exhausted from reading your blog. You are my hero. And holy crap, that woman’s back muscles are amazing!!

  4. I’d be curious to hear if you end up doing it regularly. I have friends that do it, but they’re all a little crazy for me. This is the first I’ve heard from someone who was (in my opinion) appropriately frightened of it, at least at first. 🙂

    • Oh, stay tuned! I’m appropriately intrigued enough with it… but I promise this site will not become all-CrossFit, 24/7. It’s too much fun to share the ridiculousness of my love life. 😉

  5. Jennifer Worrell

    Hysterical! Screw all that, I’d be dead:)

  6. I must try it out even if just for the experience!

    Love the punch video!

    Chat soon!

    @SpaTravelGal Ava

  7. Just finished boot camp and cried, bitched, and moaned through most of it, but this body is starting to look less like the one that birthed 5 kids and more like the one that got me into this mess. Ha! Love Love Love the cat! Erin

  8. I am so flipping impressed with you right now. I’ve just started working out a little (as in walking/jogging), and I don’t know how you could possibly do that…you’re my hero 🙂


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